The sky was pitch dark, the moon was absent, not a single star was seen
It was strangely cold, her fingers were numb but never did the thunderous footsteps stop echoing, breaking the dead silent
Even the crickets singing mute, but she forced her legs to keep on moving.
She kept on running, trying hard not to stop hoping that somehow the tighten knot forming on her chest will be released and left somewhere along the way. But she knew better for she had been running for as long as she can remember; and she still running.
She wanted to stop but didn't dare herself to even think about it.
Lots of things, questions demand for some answers; she never seemed to able to give.
The question, again and again, popped into her head;
What will she do if she can't run anymore?
She had always been terrified. Taking one meticulous step after another, calculating each one of them. But sometimes, things just don't work that way and she started to regret things and felt the fear of making another. And so she thought that it is always easier to just run away. Away from the hurt, avoid the consequences of her actions after and build the strongest wall she could muster to shield herself.
It was tiring and exhausting; but she always thought that she never had a choice.
But then she realized that even in the darkness of the night, whether or not she thought about the worst secenarios, she will somehow, in the end, able to make it through. She was able to see and unconsciously followed the light at every end of her escapades. A smile never fail to make its way on her lips, be it ever so slightly.
Later that night, she learned something.
She learned that for whatever reason she had been running away from was nowhere far and for whatever reason she had been searching for was right there all along.
Because she realized that the salt in her wound is not burning anymore than it used to. It's not that she doesn't feel the pain, it's just she's not afraid of hurting anymore.
Because all her life that's what she's been running from and because all her life, shelter and security are what she's been searching for.
She knew no one would ever be able to provide her such things; well at least not until she braced herself for whatever's coming. Life has been very complicated and unfair not only to her but to the people she loves as well. Yet then again, no one said that life is going to be easy.
She had to make the best out of things where running is no longer her solution and being hurt is no longer an option. It doesn't matter if she's all alone, because eventually everything's going to fade away. All that matter is that she has her faith in Him. She knew that she's a strong girl and as long as she has her and God's will, she will have her way.
So what she will do when she can't run anymore?
She fights back.
Typed from the rooftop; have a good night everyone.
